I felt discouraged, disappointed and full of negative thoughts and bleak visions for the future of the group when 9 people canceled last minute today, one by one!!! I felt devastated. Nine people is an entire group, for goodness sake! I received a LONG string of messages containing seriously legitimate reasons. It felt odd, however, that so many people were somehow prevented from coming, even though they have committed to it. I questioned the motives of the Universe, and the message She tries to convey.
As the time approached, I was ready to cry. I wished that nobody showed up, so there would be no witnesses to this painful and embarrassing situation. It was too late for that. The doorbell rang and I knew that there was no chance for hiding or escape—I was going to be witnessed in what I considered a painful failure.
What I didn’t know was that a whole new batch of amazing young people were going to come, bringing their openness, their humanness, and their desire to share themselves in a deeply soulful way.
As usual we went into the deepest. As usual, we co-created an exquisite experience. As usual, I feel deeply moved and vibrantly alive.
I feel grateful for all who showed up today. I also feel grateful for those who couldn't come. And I am grateful for the lesson I have (hopefully) learned: to not jump to conclusions before it’s over. To not assume the worst. To not give up just because things do not look as I expected them.
That’s the second time this week when I was clearly shown that nothing is over until the Red Lady sings... I bow humbly to Her as I am beginning to see more clearly that I don't always know what’s going on… or why.